Just another blog post
Scene
Close up: A
bathroom sink – white porcelain basin adorned with roses all around. A story
unfolds in small calligraphy entangled with the roses to end with the quotation
"As the redness of this flower, I'm on fire with love". The camera
takes a close up shot of the last line. Cut.
Ripe
The first
rose was an accident I think. The predictable outcome of your sweetness. You're
just the right measure of honey. I scrape your back and under my nails are the
few droplets which I want. With you, I rarely need to rearrange my taste buds.
Near the
old buildings – those of the woman you cherish so much. The heat sometimes does
not exist in the winter. Sometimes, it dissolves into the coolness of walls
much older than you and I. Sometimes the heat escapes in the ripened color of
fruit wanting a caress of lips and teeth.
There – in the
dissolved heat – I put her gently in the folds of the dyed skin that hold all
my unnecessary necessities. Gently so that in her ripeness her petals do no
crimson my hands.
Gently, she
lies.
If only she
could stay as soft as this moment.
I make her
shorter – like me – and I smell her heat. The color smells like you – your fleeting
scent.
Song
Roses are
red. Violets are blue. Angels in heaven. Know I love you.
Wine
Wood
carries stories better than leaves. The leaves grow weary with memory. They are
mixed up in my memory which has worn me out.
I press my
pencil to my mind as I touch the wood that was not there that day and try to
remember. Where did I leave you?
The pages
turn and turn.
I cannot
make out the language.
Even though
the days had taken away her fullness, she was still soft. Fluid. She flowed as
you stared at her on her bed of dust. She flowed as if into a glass – rushing into
the arms of a keen pining lover waiting for his fill. She flowed.
I think now
I remember. Now as I write this. Yes. It must be it. It is – memory is
sometimes kind. I remember where I left her.
She waited
for me to take her from you. She kept her water to see me. She kept her
fullness and flowed after so long.
So long,
waiting, from the day I was standing above you and you were reaching out a tree
with the instrument's case, empty of wood.
From that
day she waited, beat the dust and flowed like wine into my eyes.
Rated
Scene from
The Age of Innocence: Black background, the roses waking up deliciously.
Budding to bloomed. Open – to the heart.
Sun
Little rays
of sunshine crawling up from the green base to wash the pink with love. She was
big and bold like you.
She was
sleeping in paper, yellow golden sheets. She was yawning – prepared for a new
life. Yawning in her golden bed as you
held her up to me, shaking her waves that were coiffed flawlessly on top of her
stem.
You were
trying to make me feel better. Roses make me…Is it incomplete? Perhaps
I kept her
in water and right before I left I took her with me. My travel companion. My
rose. My partner.
You
You gave me
a shred of the sun and I keep trying to braid it into my curls.
Every time
I feel down – I feel drenched – I feel dehydrated – I feel cut off. Every time.
Then. I wonder if in my sunless days I manipulate you into watering me.
Drops
The paper
on the wall: "Roses of sunshine. Violets of dew. Angels in heaven. Know I
love you".
Wall
Does he
know?
I remember
the story of the dark lover who was lost in the bluegreen waves. I dream. I see
the cabin. She melts. I dream.
To belong
so elusively to a moment.
To shine
those moments of fear of what might have happened had -
If he
knows, would you ask him to tell me? I do not know how to feel.
Should I
feel the subtleness of the tips on my skin. The coral which I could drown
myself in any day – gifted to me so quick I do not notice. But the smell takes
me in. Should I sink into them; in their midst and bathe in the tips tickling
me as I fall or should I sink my flesh into the thorns?
Let him
tell me.
Please.
Let me
know.
Ask him to
tell us a story of lovers lost in a boat of petals sewn together. Lovers
wrapped in a quilt.
Do you
think he knows the story we want to hear?
His face
comes to my eyes and you are in my heart – pumped at every moment of being
scared of the smell of roses at my bed.
His face
comes to me and his laugh is sweet music coming from above.
And you.
You are as
beautiful as the grin of his eyes.
So come
Let me sing
for you
Come and
let me sing to you of petals that do not dry…
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